Where does a circle begin? Where does a circle end? These are my impressions in a sea of time. I will begin with the simple appearance of things.
The Tibetan Cultural Center is built on a geode-filled ridge which winds through pines that eventually come to the Center's main building, where smaller initiations, lectures and rituals are performed, and where Mr. Norbu, the Dali Lama's elder brother, lives. On this occasion, it was closed to the public due to security reasons, as His Holiness was staying there, and China would love to see him assassinated. The top of the ridge sights down a ley-line to: 1) Jangchub Chorton, or the Enlightenment Stupa, 2) a small fire puja building, 3) the new Kalachakra Stupa, built for this initiation, 4) the temporary tent housing 5,000 people rented for the occasion, and 5) the lotus pool.
All energies which were evoked by the ritual would run down the spine, effecting everyone on it, no matter what they were doing, including vendors of food, sellers of altar supplies, police and organizational tents from various monasteries. For 11 days, we had a global village, 114 countries represented (and about 1000 varieties of the common cold, one of which I currently have). 700 Tibetans came, and 300 monks. The air was comfortable, the sky blue. Meditation ran from 7:00a.m. to noon. Lectures, teachings and initiations took up the afternoons.
The lineage holders (from the 4 main sects of Tibetan Buddhism) were all present, as well as the head of the Bon lineage. This is the first time in this lifetime that they have all been together at the same time, anywhere in the world. The evenings were filled by their lectures, which took place in town, and were filled to capacity. The Drepung Loseling monks, the finest overtoneing and dancing group performed both in ceremony and in the evenings. The town's aura was unimaginable, and monks popped up everywhere, as many were in the U.S. for the first time. Various Sangha members became guides for them during their off hours. (imagine the wonder of your first mall experience!)
Artists note:
There were literally hundreds of thankas for sale, and I was able to compare and contrast the styles from the most traditional styles, of ground shell and stone and gold, to the extreme of poster paint, also the various styles each artist developed was incredibly creative considering the boundaries of tradition they had to follow.).
The Kalachakra Stupa had been finished in 100º plus weather, about 3 days before H.H.'s arrival. I watched the throne being painted in the garage by 3 monks working freehand...it was important to me to see all the human effort that took place. Lu and I ran around at the last minute, buying mums from everywhere to fill in the mulched flowerbeds, for this is a bad time for flowers.
The Stupa has four doors, in each of the four directions. And any tonal chanting within causes a lower octave resonance to be set up within the vibrating walls which comes back to you. It's quite an amazing feat. The ceiling is covered with the Kalachakra mandala, I recommend a pilgrimage for those who want to experience the Kalachakra's power for themselves. It has quite a number of purposes which one becomes aware of only when in its presence....
The tent rented for 1,000 a day, and was the size of a football field. Behind the thrones (one for H.H., and one for each of the lineage heads) were hung with 50' embroidered thankas of Shakyamuni, Kalachakra in consort, and the Kalachakra mandala--visual aids for the upcoming initiation.
A Kalachakra mandala made of sand was created during the ritual-a three day/night process. But it took an entire day of preparation to create the psychic space where it would be made. I thought about what our rituals would be like if we paid that kind of attention to them. It was, physically, on a raised platform with a pagoda type roof. The backs of the walls were covered by altars covered with tormas, more exquisite and detailed and tall than I'd ever seen (a torma is an abstract-looking icon which is an manifestation of a specific deity).
They are brought out and blessed and held to the forehead during different parts of each ritual section.
Lu and I sat third row, center, before H.H. Monks sat on the floor in front of us, other sangha members and various old friends from Tibet sat beside us, as well as my teacher. We made ourselves more comfortable on occasion by giving our wonderful seats to others, who had traveled much farther than us to see His Holiness.
O.K. So, that's the physical part of things. To say everything would take a book, and there are plenty of books out already. So I'm going to focus on specific high points and abbreviate observations.
Week One:
It's taken me a number of initiations to notice this: I've finally recognized that the foundations of Tibetan ritual lay in the meditations of multiphonic chant. The act of sitting still and toneing or even LISTENING to the tones is an incredibly active process. One is as tired out afterwards as if one had been moving furniture all day (our present activity).
The "Sadhana of the Mind" sounded like your basic sort of preliminary meditation to me. Wrong. It was a straight 5 hours of multiphonic chanting which, whether you understand the language or not, leads you out of your body, and into the state called 'emptiness'. Emptiness is the state of mind necessary for any Vajrayana initiation. It feels like tripping, without any of the mental distractions. You are erased. But-- I found myself in the sea...why here? I thought...walked and came upon a stone goddess laying partly covered y algae, head broken. It made no sense to me, and had nothing to do with the Kalachakra. I felt miserable. Afterwards, my friend Trudy, and I went to the booths to find some food. Suddenly, a thanka stood out before me. So o.k., I'd seen hundreds, but this one!! I was drawn to it irresistibly, and so was Trudy. We stared like acid heads. It was Manjushri, deity of 'discriminating wisdom'. A kind of highest manifestation of the mind. How to tell the gold from the dreck. On his face was an expression of bliss. (This is usual in thankas) But this one went straight to my heart. It was like being shot by an arrow. Immobile and enraptured, the emptiness was filled. Now, it's hard to describe what bliss is, but it is inseparable from compassion. If you understand that, you know it, if you don't, well, someday you will.
This thanka was from the Bon tent. They have different names, but many of the same deities. They also have as their central teacher, a little guy called the rainbow child. He looks as he is named. I'm told there is a deep connection between Bon and the space (rainbow) people. Perhaps it begins here.
When I returned home that day (and I had to eat a meat sandwich to get normal enough to drive), I learned that a friends 3-year-old had been strangled to death on her birthday, that day, by her father. Her last drawing had been one of the sea. This explained the previous images. I also learned that Manjushri was the transmitter of the Kalachakra.
The Sadhana had been very powerful, but I disliked it's end--because it just stopped, and no one was grounded. Lu suggests that this is the way in which one is forced to bring that empty consciousness into ones 'normal' way of being. As they've had thousands of years in which to perfect their method, I'm sure it was carefully planned.
Daily lectures and preliminary rituals continued. The older Tibetan next to me had his 6-month-old grandson, Tenzin, with him. I watched the baby as he made complex mudras along with the ritual, and he took the entire initiation. I looked at him and asked, 'Tulku?' and he gave me a big smile. What a photo that would have made, with his red cord and ritual blindfold, so did the Taiwanese contingent, who, with their press passes, were allowed to bring their cameras. I regretted the lack of Taiwanese newspapers here.
Second Week:
It was time to begin the actual initiation. Its preliminary rite was that of determining one's personal Buddha family. There are five of these, one for each quarter, one for above, and they tell you all sort of important things like what element, color and disposition you are inclined towards. In other subsequent ritual, it will indicate the door through which you will enter, for each mandala is an architects drawing of a palace, each has four gateways, and each have their personal Buddha at it's center, the point being to reach them. In India, they are often drawn onto the ground, big, and the initiates physically enter and tread through purification and meditation, towards the center, facing its guardians and finally reaching the deity which is then invoked (having already been evoked). These rites can last for days and require great training.To tell one's family, a special dried flower is given to you, which you put upon your ajna chakra. After it gathers your essence, one holds it over a specially consecrated square board which is divided into the four directions. Wherever the flower falls, that is your Buddha family.
In the Kalachakra mandala, of course, it is Kalachakra and Vishvamata, his consort, who stand at the center. On the second day of the second week, one goes first around the circle, invoking each of the directional deities, purifying oneself as one goes. On the third day, one meets the Kalachakra, enters him, moves through as his seed, into Vishvamata, then is reborn from her as a new child.
On that important day, I had given my chair to a child who had begged her mother to travel the 800 miles to come to the ritual, for she had to just see the Dali Lama. Her mother was puzzled by this, as she had not had any more than the usual teaching about him. While she was there, a Lama old her mother that her child was a Dakini, taken human form, and that she should begin her learning in another 2 years. when she had reached 14 years of age.
I sat outside in an open-air tent, connected to the ritual through a closed circuit t.v. There were many other Tibetans outside as well, and may of their children were on the ridge, playing and shouting happily. There was not one tear, one whine, one look of discontent. The adults all repeated the words of dedication. I saw blue sky, and rainbows in unusual places and it came to me unbidden, that we were here in Shamballah. No question about it. For that moment, in that place, we were all there, and I vowed to find it again, everywhere I went.
Later, I would find out that it was o the king of Shamballah that Manjushri gave the Kalachakra initiation, so its no wonder that the king was there, and his land, with us on that day.
It was the Pure Land, and all these people from all over the globe had traveled to my heats home, Bloomington Indiana, and we would remember it for the rest of our lives.
Manjushri hangs above my bed now, and Padmasambhava (the enlightened aspect of the heart), hangs above my altar, but by far, the most important thing I brought back is in my heart.
And another thing: the Kalachakra isn't over.---------------
P.S. I know I've explained a lot of things some of you already know, and I've left out bits of what might seem more important, perhaps I haven't explained enough for others; an inescapable by-product of writing to more than one at a time...but as you can see, I had to do it this way or it would never have gotten done....love and wisdom to all.
Mishlen