The Magickal Record of Fra Geh Mad

Fri. May 2, 1997
Arrive at Trusty pines for Beltane Festival. Set up tent in Ogreville and then tarp for Ordination Vigil later in the evening. Energy is good.

Have accension rite for BH who is now to be known as Thoris Fenrir. Interesting rite: basic idea is to beat the Christianity out of him. (Let me be quick to say that this is his will and not a standard Kindred rite!) We hallow sacred space, I cast a runic circle and call upon the deities to witness the rite. We give BH a total of 40 lashes with leather belts on his bare back. (The women teased him into removing his shirt but that was as far as he would go, so his buttocks had a little padding.) His back was cris-crossed with welts and he underwent his ordeal very well. I was impressed with his warrior spirit. He had prepared a vow which he burned to ash in a horn of mead and then consumed. Some of the vow he shared with us and the rest he shared later at the symbel. All in all it was a very good rite and drew the Kindred together. R. who no longer feels confortable on the land attended to be present at the rite which was really cool. We proceeded to begin a serious round of drinking just after noon!

Consort and I made a trip to the Ancestor Shrine and paid our respects with an offering. I had forgotten to bring them the airlin bottle of Whisky that I usually get for festivals so beer had to suffice.

In the early evening, one of the local tv stations had come out to do some interviews and shoot some footage to chronicle our on-going problems with the neighbors. I liked the newscaster who seemed genuinely sympathetic and interested in our beliefs. Al, Paul and I all did interviews and of course about an hour of talking got cut down to a minute or two of soundbyte. Folks that saw it said that it was good coverage. Consort and I did a 2 hour security detail on the East. As it turned out, my tarp was rite on the edge of the security path so it was a convenient shelter from the rain. (In the future, I will see that we have tarps placed at the security posts as it worked well.) After our shift, we caught a few hours of the Bardic Circle which was held under the circus tent due to the rain. I did tell a joke based on my Simpson's inspired Magickal Motto Disgusting!...but Strangely Compelling and the very same episode was shown on Mon!.

At midnight went to tarp for ordination vigil which was set up above the Ancestor Shrine on a small rise on the edge of the property. I had placed a quantity of dry wood and kindling and was able to generate a fire despite the rain. I took a great deal of time and energy to tend the fire and after the deluge began it became clear that it was a loosing proposition. I spent the evening thinkng about the community and my role in it. I had brought varous magickal supplies but didn't really do anything more than establish sacred space and burn some incense on a censor. (Continued...)

Sat. May 3
I'm not sure if I slept or not but watched the fire slowly burn out and then I became aware that it was sunrise and the clergy of GDT were accross the creek from me. I stood up and saw my sponser Dr. B. by the creek, apparently contemplating a crossi ng. The creek had risen during the night and was very swollen. Dr B. said that preparations were not quite ready so I went back to the tarp to await his call. In the ritual that followed, I met each of the Clergy members at an elemental station in which I was challenged and given a gift of that element. Finally we reached the main ritual circle and the clergy folk stepped into the fire ring. I was deeply moved as I watched them invoke the Spirit of our community and impressed that in many ways they are the heart of the community and were standing at the physical locus of that heart! They called me forward and I entered the ring that they formed and felt them invoke this Spirit into me. I was deeply moved. I watched as my brother D. went through a similar process just behind me.

DA gave me a piece of shell that she had from her collection and later Owen gave me a beautiful Carnelian. I had an ecellent conversati on with him in which he pointed out how similar the Ordination Rite was to the birthing ritual that we had done for him some time ago.

It wasn't too wet earlier on in the day and the festivities progressed. The Maypole dance was really great and had a lot of energy. I was dissapointed though that there werer a number of folks that choose not to dance. Also for the main rite this year we had chosen to have a May Kng and Queen and many of the eligible teens thought it was uncool and didn't want to take part in it. I thought about how awesome it was that they had the opportunity to do something like this, as I had never had a chance to when I was a lad! You know you are getting old when youth strikes you as jaded!

I decided not to try and crash out and just plugged along throught he day. The cold and rain did daunt folk's spirits somewhat but we made the best of it. Consort and I had run through our supply of dry clothes and I had stupidly forgot to pack a second pair of boots so we were both wet from the waist down. By the time that dinner rolled around the conditions had really gotten to her and she was shivering uncontrolllably. I got her bundled up and warm but was concerned that I would have to leave the festival to see to her needs and not fulfill my ritual duties at the main rite. The soul entitiy reminded us that there was a new pair of boots in the car for her that had been there for months and never been worn. Such a tranformation by one pair of boots is a truely frightening thing. So we were able to stay. Although the food was the usual bland fesitval fair, the feast was done very well and included excellent ritual elements, feeding your neighbors with the first bites and being fed by same and givin g the next bite to the ancestors. There was also great hilarity in the antics of the serving wenches who all had wode blue faces! Maegdlynn did a great job of organizing this and Nancy really stepped to the fore to make it manifest in the dining area.

The procession to the main rite was more of a hurried affair due to the rain and cold. There were some delays at the circle and then the rite manifested. The circle was banished, censed and asperged and then the quarters were called. Janice and I called our quarter with great vigor. I used the Havamal passage in Old Norse that describes Odhin's getting the runes to invoke him and then she briefly told the story of his theft of the Horn of Poetic Inspiration from Gunloth as we performed a sort of mini play in which I drank three druaghts from the horn and spit out the poet's portion, thus conceptually invoking the element of water in the west. The God and Goddess were invoked into the May Couple and then the group passed between the cauldron bale-fires and the drumming and dancing proceeded.

Returned Sunday to pick up abandoned equipment and help in general cleanup. Sort of felt like Beltane consumation hadn't been quite accomplished as I hadn't gotten laid over the festival! R. had large phallus made from broken spar of old ritual structure. Those present had a vague notion that something needed to be done with it and P. proposed that it be installed in the main ritual circle near the Goddess earthwork. I had a strong sense that the proper culmination/coupling of Spring energies had not been accomplished and suggested that we "service" the Goddess with the phallas. P. and I proceed to do same and install the Phallas upright in ground between Goddess' ankles. We drive the phallas into the ground to create it's own foundation hole and then reverse it to point upright. As we finish we hear a sound from the wood which turns out to be a woodpecker! A very good omen.

Thurs. May 8, 1997
Ranger came by with some starter to try and get my stuck mead going. We added it to the carbouy and put a heating pad in place for better temperature. This is getting to be a frustrating situation. And a bad omen that the first batch is being a problem.
Sat. May 10, 1997
Attend family wedding. Got to Catholic Mass for service which is very interesting from a ritualistic perspective. I am also surprised by some of the changes that I percieve since my days as a Catholic boy!

Mon. May 12, 1997
Very weird melancholy vibe today... First day of AIDS awareness week. I go to the exhibit on the commons and find myself thinking of Prof. Joe Denny, who died of AIDS. I recall going to his funeral service on campus and being surprised at how much wit and joi de vivre people remembered him having. (I met him after he had be caught in the throes of this horrible wasting illness...) Then I run into D. who has just come from a class in German culture in which they showed a Holocaust film called Yellow Star. She realized that halfway thru the film she was looking intently at all the Jews trying to spot the parents of a mutual friend who litterally has no history as she just turned up at the liberation of one of the camps, an emaciated 3 year old with ricketts and malnutrition. I did not know this previously... Sometimes the struggle to project some meaning on Life seems a rather pathetic endeavor.

Tues. May 13, 1997
M. does herbal workshop at student group. Very light turnout. We make dream pillows. As we are consecrating them, I am thinking that I want the pillow to produce the effects of deep sleep and astral travel. I begin visualizing the Raidho rune for travel and realize that it is also the rune of rhythm and probably not a good choice for sleep. I seize upon the Laguz rune as more apropos and then see that it can be found geometricly as existing within the Raidho rune which I then percieve as the combination of the geometric forms of Wunjo and Laguz. This is an interesting pattern. Not sure I see how Raidho is the binding/combination/synthesis of Wunjo and Laguz as yet... WRL WLR LWR...? Of course this works in a very psychosexual way: water/lubrication/emotional energies produce Joy through repetitive, rythmic motion!

May 25, Sunday
Good Kindred meeting. We have a short discussion on the reading which covers the basic outline of Asatru ritual especially the Blot and then spend most of the time discussing the upcoming Troth Moot that we will be attending in June. D. is kind enough to attend in spite of heavy course load to answer questions about the moot. Since everyone is off the following day we make a late nite of it and watch a Subgenius video that Dr. B. has lent DL. It is very amuzing and reminds me of the early days of the Bob Club astrology discussion group.

May 26, Monday
Vivid dream. I break some sort of minor law but instead of a fine, I am sent to prison for a short time like 60 or 90 days. I am sitting at a sort of table, playing a game which is based on patterns, perhaps a memory or concentration style game. The game is a gift from my father and although very fine, I am thinking that it is essentially a nicer version than one that I already have and that there has been a failure on the part of my friends on the outside to communicate and coordinate their efforts to support me. An inmate comes up and drags a chair over to sit at the table. I pull his chair away from my space and explain that I don't want any company, but as I turn back to my game someone else has taken my seat. I give up and tell them to be sure and get all the playing pieces back in the box when they are done. The one guy is obviously retarded or mentally slow. Then I am outside but still in prison. Thor (a friend, not the deity) and Court are making wine by cutting up strawberries and placing them in a pot of water. They also have blueberries and I remark that those must be broken up to be used in wine. Some other folk walk up and I am talking to my friend M. L. (who is actually serving a murder bit). As I try to ask him privately about the retarded man, he appears and I am not able to... We go over to some other area where a bunch of prisoners are laying/sitting on a trampoline (not bouncing) watching tv. I ask M. L. about the retarded guy and whether he is allright, meaning can he be trusted, etc. M. L. sort of grins and laughs an says that I'll have to figure that out for myself. I say that I think that he seems alright but that he is obviously a bit loose in the head and M. L. laughs. Then M. L. tells me that we will always be friends and that I can count on him. As I awake I hear a very strong voice say: "The Norn of the Soul must turn up the box." Hmmm, Perthro is the Rune of the lot-box and is connected with Wyrd and by extension the Norns... Not sure what to make of this.

May 28, Wed.
Rune study group meets and discusses previous two week Mannaz period. This generates a wonderful discussion of our various concepts of how the universe works and our place therein. It is amazing how useful such discussions are not only for getting to know others better but also to crystalize one's own conception of the state of affairs into the matrix of language.

The Laguz galdor is very potent!

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